Monday, February 8, 2010

PMS ect.

I hate when I'm bitchy.  I particularly hate the fact that I'm bitchy with my family and my already pretty short fuse becomes nonexistent.  I'm snippy, I'm bitchy, I'm depressed and almost nothing can make me happy for long.  It sucks.

I am currently trying not to let this PMS take over my life (for as long as it's around anyway) because it's not fair.  I should be able to control my emotions but PMS sure makes it damn hard to do that!!!!

In other news, I've started printing our invitations!!
The caption reads:

~As golden autumn imbues her radiant leaves
Tired summer rests as the seasons weave
As harvest begins, joyful hearts renew
There will be one, where once were two~

And then the rest of the information follows (though it's not pictured here)...

Thursday, February 4, 2010

Deep breath

In and out.  Sigh.

Things will be ok with our nursing situation.  I'm not taking the job at the call centre.

I am, however, going to continue looking for part time work so that I can continue nursing and I did receive a call today about another job that is part time so we'll see if that pans out!  I'm not against the idea of working, I'm just against the idea of quitting nursing when my daughter is clearly not ready and not interested in anything but me!  She even takes solids sparsely.  She really enjoys apples, pears and peaches but isn't interested in anything but.  The girl cannot live on fruit alone!

So, the plan is, part time for now while I'm her main food source.  Then in April when she's able to have some cows milk and also eating some more solids (hopefully!!!) then I will look into the full time job with my best friend.  I'm hoping it all works out my way!!!

Anyway, here is a preview of our stag and doe tix!!

Tuesday, February 2, 2010

The logisitcs

Well I got a job.  The one at the call centre.  And about an hour and a half later, Jer got called to go to school for his apprenticeship from March 1st to April 23rd.  Monday to Friday days.

My training would be 7:30am to 3pm, 5 days a week but I'm not sure what days.  I'm supposed to start on the 18th.

We've been working on the bottle for Marryn too.  It's not going well...we've tried formula, juice, a mix of my milk and formula....she won't have any of it.  We're gonna keep trying...there is a nipple that is shaped like her nuni (pacifier) that we're gonna get and see if that helps.

I'm so damn down about this whole situation and it stinks!  I was thinking about it on my way to my interview...and I know I've been all sappy and emotional about it and so I thought to myself, "I'm gonna suck it up, put on my big girl panties and go to work to help keep my family afloat while we're in this situation."  I know Marryn will be ok, though it'll be hard.  And then when Jer got called it was like a spiral right back to where I was yesterday when I was bawling while watching Jer try to get a screaming Marryn to take a bottle that she didn't want.

Anyway, we're gonna talk about it and work on it and see what we can come up with...in the mean time, we picked and ordered our stag and doe tickets!

Monday, February 1, 2010

Happy February

Ahhh, the month before spring...the month of red and pink hearts and romance and chocolate....the month of groundhogs and shadows and now also Family Day (though I think just about everyday is family day, I don't need a day to tell me to appreciate them!).

I've always loved February.  Even though it's usually the coldest month of the year, it's also the shortest month and it's so much closer to spring than January!!

I'm hoping to start off this month great and be offered a job soon!  As much as I don't want to, if I have to, I want to just do it already.  I HATE job searching...I always have!  I got a call from one of the call centres in the area and I returned the call and left a message so I'm just waiting to hear back from them again.  I think that's my best bet at the moment.  Until something better comes along anyway.

We've finally got our Stag and Doe booked for July 16th!  I've been doing a lot of planning around that right now and I'm in the process of designing tickets...I'll probably post a couple of pictures to get some feedback (not than anyone comments often, but I figure maybe I'll put a vote thingy up).

This month is kinda quiet, which is nice.  A few appointments but other than that not much is going on.  Of course, Valentine's day is coming up but with our current $$ situation, we probably won't do a whole lot, if anything.  Which is ok, again, I don't need a day to tell me to love and appreciate my signifigant other...I love him and appreciate him everyday.  I'll get him a card but that may be the extent of it!

James has a bowling tournament about an hour and a half away at the end of the month as well that we're all looking forward to...I'm so happy he enjoys it and it's good at it!

Then, MARCH!!  Bring on the sunshine and dew and sprouts and buds!  I can't wait to smell that earthy scent again.  I'm grateful that our winter has been so lienient on us but I'm still so looking forward to spring!

Saturday, January 30, 2010

Unboring weekend :)

This is the first time in a long time that I've had something to do all weekend.  Today I went to my friend's baby shower...I love baby showers :)  Most people hate them but I love them, I always have.   How could you not love going to celebrate someone's new arrival?? :)

Then tomorrow my best friend and I are going to mass to check out the church I'm getting married in.  I've been there before but I never thought to count the pews lol...I have to make pew cones and figure out how many pumpkins we need as well so we're gonna make the trip out there.  Marnie has never seen it either so it'll be nice to get her thoughts on how we should decorate.

Then tomorrow night we're all getting together with a few more friends to play our Wii.  I love having people over to hang out where it's relaxed like that :)  So much fun!

I also got another call about a job today, this one for a call centre.  I've done that plenty of times so it doesn't make me nervous or anything....I just know that it's full time and we'll have to see about the nursing thing.  I'll update when I know more.

Friday, January 29, 2010

Job interviews and sadness

I had two yesterday.  They were both informal, one being at a Tim Horton's and the other being after a hypnotist show at a comedy club.

One is part time, one is full time.  My good friend Boho Mom babysat for the one at night at the comedy club which is the full time one.  Upon returning home she asked, "How the hell are you going to manage this??".  Although Marryn was good, she knows when I'm not home and she misses my breasts.  Boho mom and her daughter along with my sons fed Marryn some applesauce when she was hungry and although she gobbled it up, it's not the same as mom's milk.

I have this knot in the pit of my stomach that is letting me know that this is NOT going to work.  I have to figure something else out...I'm still applying for jobs but hoping that something comes along that will work out in a way that will allow me to continue nursing her the way she wants.

She will NOT take formula...we've tried that.  It doesn't taste anywhere close to the same as my milk and she knows the difference.  We tried that early on in hopes that we could get out for more than two hours at a time.  But even at a month old, she knew the difference and was not interested.  I do have a pump but it is an occasional use pump...I could probably make due with that for a short time but even then...there is no "extra" milk.  I would have to pump a LOT to get a single serving (as I have done in the past).  I'm going to start soon in hopes that I can have a bottle or two in the event that I do get a job.

And then even if that does happen and I have the bottle or two, I will have to pump at work in order to keep my milk supply up and keep the extra bottle for Dad or whoever is taking care of her while I'm at work.

It all feels so very complicated.  It all feels so very wrong.

I've been searching for years for an at home data entry job...I can type like 800 words per minute.  I would be GOOD at that job...and then still be able to do my main job, my full time job, my most rewarding job here at home.

I hate feeling torn between money and taking care of my family (especially since having money is part of taking care of my family).  I hate feeling like I'm not contributing if I'm not working (since I most certainly am paying half of the bills with other income).  Most of all I hate this depression that has come over me since accepting that I need to find work, even temporarily, to keep our family afloat.

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

This is a kitchen sink post

I'm feeling sort of down these last few days.  I've recently had to come to terms with the fact that I need to work at the moment.  I really enjoy my job as a stay at home mom and I'm feeling really down about going to work and quitting breastfeeding early (unless I find a job that will work around Marryn's schedule which I'm not expecting).  I can still pump and still nurse her when I am home but it won't be the same.  I know, as long as she's getting what she needs it doesn't matter right?  Well, it does to me.  My favourite time is when I'm nursing her...it's such an amazing feeling to know that she needs me for such an important job!  But, my family also needs me to go to work while Jer is off and while it's not what I want to do, it's what I need to do and so I will do it.

Some people have said to me that it must be nice to have the "luxury" of staying home and doing nothing all day.  I can assure them that I DO NOT do nothing.  I will miss my duties here at home and it will probably drive me a little crazy that I'm not doing things "my way" lol...some people don't get that though.

I have an interview tomorrow night at a comedy club as a box office sales agent.  It's full time days with some nights.  Should be interesting and I'll update.

I miss the routine of Jer at work too.  It was up to me to get up and get the kids ready and off to school and from there I would come home and tidy and sometimes start dinner if it was something that needed to be slow cooked like roast or spaghetti sauce.  Now, I've been staying up later and sleeping in longer because Jer will get up with the kids part of the time.  I'll look forward to going back to that routine even though I'll miss having Jer around all the time.  It's fun that we get to hang out everyday!  Lots of quality time :)

It's also been good with wedding planning.  I've been able to ask his advice and preference on stuff while I'm looking at it instead of having to send a message or email about it.  We've recently decided on a limo and flowers which we weren't sure we were going to do before.  I'm really looking forward to how the next 9 months are going to play out!  It will be nice to see all our hard work come together in the most fun way!  Hopefully ours is a reception that people will always remember!!!  How could you not in costume?!

I have more to write but I think it should have a post dedicated to it.  So I will end here and write more later/tomorrow.  I also feel the urge to write another chapter so that may be coming soon as well.

Later!

Sunday, January 24, 2010

9 months and counting

Well, there is a little over 9 months until the wedding now.  When I think about it, it still seems so far away but when I really look at it, it's only a pregnancy away! lol...leave it to me to look at it that way!

We've got a lot done so far:

Invitations, my dress, Marryn's dress, my shoes, my hair stylist, a florist, the reception hall, the church, the limo, the favours, the mens tux store (haven't picked styles yet though)...our DJ and decorators are all contracted through our reception hall so they're booked too and now our Stag and Doe is booked as well.

I'm really looking forward to it all coming together.  I've been waiting for this my whole life...to find THE one.  The one who looks at me the way he does and says the things I dreamed my future husband would say.  It's going to be such a beautiful, wonderful day, I can't hardly wait!!!

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

Engagement session

Which I'm not entirely happy with but here are some pics...




Sunday, January 17, 2010

Oh Anonymous...are you really that blind?

I received this comment on a previous post:

Anonymous said...
Wow... it sounds like you blame others a lot for your choices and fit yourself into a victim role just nicely. Do you ever take responsibility?

January 1, 2010 10:53 AM


*shakes head*

Funny that you have to hide behind anonymous but whatever...I get it. But really, if you had read the post prior to this one in which I state: "He has done things, I have done things and our son has been put in the middle on numerous occasions. I have made BIG mistakes and plenty of them."

I know I fucked up and I'm not ashamed to admit it. But I also know I've worked really hard to fix the wrongs that I've done. I fought when I didn't think I had any fight left. And I know there are SOME people out there who don't think I deserve what I have because of the way things played out and the decisions I made when I was younger. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion.

I know this though. Shitty things have happened to me. I know that those shitty things helped lead me down the path to get me to where I am...because without all of this shitty things that happened and shitty things I've done, I wouldn't be where I am and I wouldn't have what I have.

I have a beautiful, loving family that I'm so damned proud of I could just scream it from the rooftops!

I've worked really hard to get where I am and I'll be damned if someone is going to make me feel guilty for accepting all of the gifts I have recieved.

I may have played the victim in the past, but I found when I stopped and owned up to all the shit I needed to take responsibility for? That's when things turned around for me.

Shitty things still happen and I still have to deal with douchebags but I can handle it. I'm stong and I have wonderful support behind me. And all the people who did/do the shitty things don't matter anymore!

I'm a happy, HAPPY girl now...I love my life. I love my family. I love my friends. And I love that I've worked so hard to get past everything so that I CAN love all of that. I love that I'm strong enough to overcome whatever has been thrown at me and continue to get back up and keep living my life and taking care of my family!!!

Peace to you and yours anonymous and thanks for the comment. Helps me reaffirm!

Wednesday, January 13, 2010

3500 candidates for 50 jobs

Our little city is not doing well. There have been major job losses over the last 2 years with the closure of several plants, the biggest being John Deere in which my future mother-in-law, father-in-law and step brother all lost their jobs along with umpteen hundred other people. There aren't many jobs in this city...not even part time ones that can make up for what unemployment insurance doesn't cover.

I consider us lucky even though Jer's laid off right now. It'll be three weeks tomorrow. But it could be worse, he could have lost his job all together and have no opportunities at all. Luckily, he's in a union and it's only a matter of time before there is another job for him AND we don't lose our benefits during his out of work time.

Yesterday the local Rona, which is slated to open in three months, held a job fair. There were people lined up outside the hotel they held it at for ours to try and get one of the 50 jobs they're offering. 3500 people to be exact. You know it's tough when 3500 people show up for 50 minimum wage jobs because there are no other options.

I feel incredibly sad about it. It's definitely a reality check.

I've been looking on and off for something part time to make a bit while Jer's off work...it's very discouraging to hear about the job fair yesterday. I'm thinking now that finding something is going to be harder than I thought. I check the job bank almost everyday. Nothing has been posted for our city since last Friday. Everything that is available is out of town and even then it's not much.

I really hope things pick up for everyone soon...this is horrible.

Thursday, December 17, 2009

6 Months Old

Miss Marryn is 6 months old today....I can't believe how quickly the first half of her first year has gone! I love this stage though and she's so adorable. Saying dada already and eating some solids...here are a bunch of my fave pics of her :D














Wednesday, December 16, 2009

2 Weeks left

Well, there are only two weeks left of 2009. This year has been a good and bad year.

I have my oldest son full time now, meaning no more trips to dads on the weekend where we miss out on including him in family outings and get togethers.

We had our beautiful daughter 6 months ago tomorrow.

We got officially engaged 4 days ago!! YAY!



We lost a couple people this year...that was the bad part. They are loved and missed very much.

My wishes for 2010 are this:

~Happiness and health for all those I know and love.

~Financial stability (which has been pretty good in the last 6 months so I hope it continues!)

~A beautiful wedding that goes off without a hitch...only 10.5 months away!

2009 was a very memorable year for me. I turned 30 and almost all my dreams came true!! 2010 will be just as memorable because the last of my BIG dreams...my wedding...will be coming true. I'm very much looking forward to this year.

What do you wish for this year?

Much love! xo

Friday, December 4, 2009

Chapter Two - The Chase

When I met him, I didn't have any expectations that it would go anywhere. I was only 16 and he was 21 with a 1 year old daughter. Right away my gut told me he was too old for me, I tended to date younger guys. The group that hung out there was fun though so I continued to go back a few times to hang out and get high. Because that's what we did when we were 16 with no rules...we smoked pot. It wasn't until a few months later that I realized I hated the high and stopped smoking it all together. I already didn't drink because I didn't like the feeling it left me with, not to mention my vomitting phobia.

One night, I decided not to go there for whatever reason and he called me and convinced me to come anyway, he would make me dinner. No one had ever made me dinner except my mom so I agreed and he came and picked me up on his bike. Our dinner consisted of Lipton's chicken noodle soup and peanut butter and jelly sandwiches eaten at the coffee table on the floor. I hated the way he ate. He chewed with his mouth open and belched while we were eating. It drove me nuts and was enough for me to make the decision that I would not be dating him. We hung out a bit longer and then I made an excuse about forgetting medication that I'd left at "home" where I was staying and left. I hadn't planned on returning.

Over the course of the week following he called everyday and tried to hang out. Being as young as I was and not always the "popular" one, I enjoyed the attention and finally agreed to go over there again. I met his daughter and fell in love with her, she was adorable and liked me well enough it seemed. He said he liked how I cared for her and said he'd like to have another someday. It was the bait and hook he'd needed to reel me right in. I'd wanted a baby for as long as I could remember. Yes, even at that age. I knew people would be mad. I didn't care. I had lived my life full of trying to make people like/love me the way I'd needed to be loved. I only wanted to be accepted and I knew at a very young age that my child would love me for who I was and I wouldn't need to "try" with them. There would be instant and uninhibited love. I so wanted that. I so needed that.

Thursday, December 3, 2009

Chapter One - The Introduction

A lot of pretty crappy things have happened between my ex and I and our son in the 13years I have known him. He has done things, I have done things and our son has been put in the middle on numerous occasions. I have made BIG mistakes and plenty of them. In my defense, I was only 17 when I had him and knew nothing of being a parent and to top it off I had every adult I knew tell me I couldn't do it and bring parenting at a young age into a negative light so often that I almost gave up.

There were people who would do whatever they could to help me fail and people who helped if they thought it would benefit them. Either way, when I grew up some and realized just how much I loved my son and remembered why I'd had him in the first place, it was no question that I needed to fight as hard as I could to get him back. It was a long hard road that saw me kicked many times while I was already down so far I didn't think I could get any lower.

It all started when I was 16 years old. I had a pretty crappy life living at home. My step father was not very nice to me and treated me like the middle step child I was and my mother worked a lot and had her own issues and either didn't see or chose not to see. Either way, just about everything was all my fault. I had more chores than a teenager should have because I did my little brothers share as well. When my older step brother lived with us I was called names and treated poorly every day...I have proof of this on a home movie from 1990. But, I digress, the point I was getting at was that I left home at 16, all of that was a part of the reason why.

I lived with friends on and off, here and there and eventually moved to Welland. I acted like a typical 16 year old with no rules...I walked to the store at 4am in my sock feet just because I could. I went to Tim Horton's at all hours of the night because no one was telling me I needed to be in at a certain time...I had never had that before. Having to be home at 9pm when all of your friends are allowed out til 11pm is a BIG drag and makes you feel like a HUGE loser when you're 16 years old.

Anyway, during one of my late night visits to Timmy's, I saw a girl I hadn't seen in years. We went to grade school together and she left after Grade 5. After talking for a few minutes she said, "OMG YOU'LL BE PERFECT FOR MY UPSTAIRS NEIGHBOUR!!!" and we made plans to get together the next night.

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

On being treated like garbage

Someone owes me some money. I was supposed to get some of it on the 13th and didn't find out until the evening of the 13th that I wouldn't be getting any until the 30th. The other person involved normally emails me to let me know what is going on. She didn't and didn't respond to the two emails I sent. So I texted said person that owes me money. In turn, I received a harsh text message that basically said, "You'll get what you get when you get it" because he "didn't have much time to write". I argued that a "I'm not sure I'll let you know asap" would have taken the same amount of time as the text I did receive but, whatever. I then received an email from the female party basically asking "how dare I" contact the male party as he is busy with his new job and has been away training and doesn't know what's going on with the situation and that he had already let me know that I was getting $X amount of money on or about December 1st. In the same email I was also told that I was basically asking for too much and that I was receiving 1 payment a month which is all that is required and so I should, in not so many words, shut up and take what I'm getting, I'll get the rest when it's convienient. Then, even though it is the male party who owes this money, I was told by the female party not to bother the male party about it again. I again had to argue, if you knew money was coming to you, would you not want to know how much and when? Is this an unreasonable request? I think not.

To say the least, this really PISSED ME THE FUCK OFF.

When I sent the text message, all I was asking was when and how much. I did NOT demand anything. I did not threaten anyone. And I sure as shit wasn't rude about it. However, I get nothing but ignorance back. From people that asked me to do them a favour by not having authority involved in the money payment. I agreed. I usually do, because typically? I'm not an unreasonable, unagreeable person. These people do nothing but cause me grief.

If it's not one thing, it's another...and I really would like to post the extent of it but I won't due to privacy issues...but really...this is just the tip of the iceberg and I could go on and on...I could probably write a book detailing the crap that has gone on. What I really want to do is say screw it and take it to a higher level and force payments. Then I don't have to deal with thier inability to communicate civilly at all.


GRR.


Anyway...

Friday, November 13, 2009

Early Birthday Surprise, complete with Nikki Payne!

So, because I have the best future husband in the WORLD, I was pleasantly surprised yesterday by a birthday dinner that I had no idea about!! It was so wonderful to have everyone there for my birthday, even being a month early, because usually no one can make it so close to Christmas!

We had dinner and then watched a comedy show including Nikki Payne who we met in the lobby (!), as well as Johnny Gardhouse, Paul Haywood, Dave Hudson, Terry McGurrin, Marc Sinodinos, Winston Spear, Mark Walker, Pete Zedlacher, and Mark Matthews (it was a benefit show called Komedy for Kidneys, all Canadian performers)!!! It was AWESOME and totally unforgettable and if it was at all possible to love him more, I do!!!

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

In response to an anonymous comment

I received a comment in response to my last post about how ridiculous this whole swine flu thing is and I wanted to respond here because otherwise I wasn't sure if it would be read and the commenter had implied that I was uneducated about the shot and I wanted to defend myself about that because that is certainly not the case.

I had a debate with someone else about this yesterday as well and I'm really starting to wonder if the majority of the public is just that naive that they think that our health care system and government are really that trustworthy that they won't do something to line their pockets even more...

This shot is NOT well researched. It is new. It has not been widely tested and I do NOT trust it.

There is a ton of media hype...but not only that, there is gov't, health care and doctor hype too.

This vaccine may be made like all the other ones however there are signifigant risks associated with injecting yourself with not only Thiomersal but also with Squalene which has not been found to be completely safe.

It's not the use of the virus that I worry about...it's all the other shit that they put in it. And if you read about Thiomersal and the toxicology, it states that it is incredibly dangerous upon inhalation, ingestion and contact with the skin yet we are injecting this into us??? Yeah, that sounds ok to me *rolls eyes*.

The commenter said:

"In reality, the risk of a really nasty flu far outweighs the risk of the vaccine. Even if you don't care if you get the flu, I do. I care that you could easily spread it to others who may not tolerate it (infants, elderly, people with compromised immune systems, ets)."

Yes, this is a REALLY nasty flu. However, I know of several people who have contracted it (been tested and diagnosed) who, while have been very sick, have recovered just fine.

People die from this flu. That is a truth. But people die from the regular flu. People can die from the common cold if they get sick enough for it to develop into something else like pneumonia. The truth is, we can't be sure what is going to kill us...including a flu or a vaccine. A few statistics and bits of info I think are important to take into consideration if you are contemplating this shot:

*The World Health Organization (WHO) has classified the 2009 spread of a novel H1N1 avian/swine/human influenza virus as a ‘pandemic’. But numerous doctors have remarked that it has been no more deadly or disabling than seasonal influenza virus that circulates yearly.

* Human trials only just began in mid-August. It’s unethical to recommend a vaccine which hasn’t even received the usual minimal safety testing let alone long term testing.

*A recent WHO Press Conference confirmed that there is no safety data regarding the use of squalene adjuvanted vaccines for pregnant women, asthmatics and children between the ages of 6 months to 3 years. Yet both pregnant women and young children are targeted groups on the priority list for injection, along with health care providers.

*The vaccination program for the 1976 swine flu "pandemic" was discontinued after 3 weeks due to the unexpected outcome. Over 500 cases of Guillain-Barre Syndrome, a paralyzing neurological condition, were reported as a result of vaccination, responsible for 25 deaths. Contrarily, the virus itself was responsible for 1 death and 13 hospitalizations (these are US stats). Experts assure the population that this scenario will not be repeated, because they have tweaked the vaccine into its updated version. However, without adequate preliminary testing, the possibility of unknown side effects must be taken into consideration.

*This is the first year mock vaccines have been used to gain FDA approval. The vaccines that have been tested are not the same vaccines your children will be given.

* 18 reasons why you SHOULDN'T get the vaccine

* Deaths associated with H1N1

*According to the World Health Organization: "Every winter, tens of millions of people get the flu. Most are only ill and out of work for a week, yet the elderly are at a higher risk of death from the illness. We know the worldwide death toll exceeds a few hundred thousand people a year, but even in developed countries the numbers are uncertain, because medical authorities don't usually verify who actually died of influenza and who died of a flu-like illness."

* AS03-Adjuvanted H1N1 Pandemic Influenza Vaccine product information leaflet

RESEARCH BEFORE YOU DECIDE

When I post here like I did yesterday, I am posting MY. OPINION.

I am not a doctor...I am not a scientist and I never claimed to be an expert. However I do know that I feel the risk of the vaccine far outweighs the risk of the flu itself FOR ME AND MY FAMILY.

If you want to get the vaccine, all the power to you, good luck, I hope it works out for you.

If I end up sick, I promise to stay home and wash my hands obsessively as not to spread it further...but I do that with any sickness and therefore this is no different.

I am not relying on those vaccinated to "protect me" at all. I'm relying on those who are sick to stay the fuck home until their better as not to spread it to anyone else!!!

And don't forget, just because you have the vaccine, does not mean you're immune!! You can still contract H1N1 so there are no guarantees. Again, another reason to NOT get it in my opinion.

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Ahhhh it's the swine flu!!!!

!!

Seriously...I'm not nearly as panicked as the gov't and media WANT me to be.

Yes, it is a flu. Yes, it can be very serious. Yes, there have been deaths.

No, I'm not in a "priority group" for the vax and NO WE WON'T BE GETTING IT!!!!

I don't feel that this has been researched NEARLY enough. I read the leaflet that comes in the box with the vaccine and there is conflicting information on it. That doesn't make me trust ANYONE involved with it. I've been hearing all about the mercury in it and this other stuff that is not good for you as well as all the side effects that could happen including paralysis....YEAH, SIGN ME UP! *rolls eyes*

I don't know why so many people put their faith in this shit. The mass media hype...the way they are PUSHING this on everyone...the fact that 17 people have died from it and yet 3-4 thousand people die from the regular flu every year?

It SCREAMS at me that something is not right about it.

I ask everyone who is even THINKING about getting this shot to PLEASE research it. I really believe that it is dangerous and that the other shoe is about to drop about what could happen to you if you DO get it.

Over and out.

Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Random with pictures

Ok, I know it's been a month...sorry! Sometimes I forget that people do still read even if they don't comment and really I should be writing more because it's such a great outlet for me. Anyway...I'll try not to forget anymore and I may even try to do that November Blog everyday thing this year...we'll see :)

So, where to start?

I am still in wedding mode BIG time...I now have my bouquet prototype, 24 favours done (probably more, I just started today and I'm not finished working on them, just taking a break)
, my shoes, my dress (half paid for)(no pictures for this either, saving it for the wedding day :)), our reception hall, Marryn's dress (minus the flower, it's detatchable), my bridesmaids gifts (though they will be decorated some how and that part isn't done yet), a church and the invitations (which was what started all of this to begin with hehe). I'm definitely on a roll and as of today there are 12 months and 9 days til our wedding!

Jer is working CRAZY hours right now...7 days a week, 12.5 hours a day for the next couple of weeks. Great for the money, not so much for the time spent with the family but knowing this isn't forever and it's helping us in the long run makes it easier. It will be a nice Christmas he says :)


James is well...on the Volleyball team at school, I'm so proud of him for doing stuff like that! He is still dealing with dad stuff but I try to make it as easy as I can for him. He's not going to his dad's bootcamp graduation in a couple of weeks and know it's making him sad. He really wanted to go but apparently dad didn't get the paperwork in when he was supposed to or something like that and then they also won't have time to drive him home because they're moving a couple of hours away the same weekend...it's a big mess and honestly I'm kind of glad he's not going because the last time he was with them, the woman dad is with sent James home because he was "misbehaving and didn't deserve to be there"...BS but what can you do...I don't want him to have to deal with something like that again.

Jonah is also well...that said, there isn't too much to report on him...he's spledidly uneventful :) He still says the cutest things like, after being given a new ball by a saleslady at the fashion for fats store, "I love balls!!!" to which I cannot help but laugh...even though it's inappropriate to laugh lol...and to which he asked me why I was laughing, and I said nothing, and he said "Are you laughing at Marryn?" and said yes...because what would you have said?? lol



Marryn is also blissfully well :D She's growing so fast...4 months already and so adorable you could eat her little fingers as an appetizer for the rest of her hehe. I think she's getting a tooth though so once in a while she's a bit bitchy...to be expected though ;)

Other than that, not much is happening...I'm baking bread
like crazy (it's SO good and of course we've all gained 5lbs since I bought the bread machine lol) and baking other stuff more frequently now that my mom has lent me her kitchen aid mixer.

I'm toying with the idea of taking a baking course at the college in the relatively distant future...definitely wouldn't be for a couple of years but I think it's something I'd really enjoy doing.

So I hope everyone is as well as we are...because we are pretty great :D

Much love :)